… I feel that, as a former presidential candidate, I should weigh in on this whole Trent Lott thing. The poor fella went down because he did what Bill Clinton did not do, he told the truth. About himself, anyway. It’s common knowledge that all those guys who make up the ‘Good Old Boys’ never actually changed their beliefs about race, but merely took their hatred inside, so to speak. I’m not surprised at all that Mr. Lott (who, by the way, has a daughter named Pia) said what he said at the event he was at. Hello? Did anyone ask Strom Thurmond what he thought about Trent’s comment? After all, it was his birthday party that almost brought down the entire Republican Party.Personally, I think Mr. Thurmond (I hope he’s not related to Uma, I kinda like her so far) is really dead anyway. In fact, I think he’s been dead for a very long time. What was that movie called, Weekend At Bernie’s? Yeah, that’s it. They’ve been propping him up, throwing their voices to make it seem like it’s him talking, and raising his hands with strings during Senate votes. Hey, don’t look at me, Franklin Roosevelt could not walk at all, and no one knew it, except, of course, people who saw him in person.
That’s why President Roosevelt did his famous Fireside chats on the radio! They didn’t want the American public to see Frankie being carried into the room and strapped to a chair, OK? Something about morale, or some such shit. And it goes on. President Kennedy was doped up so much that he probably didn’t even know he’d been shot. And I’m starting to believe that President Clinton walked around the Oval Office with his dick hanging out of his pants like he was at Touche or the Eagle or something. So, it would be rather easy to convince the voting public (especially in Mississippi, Alabama, South Carolina, you know, the South) that a dead man was the senior Senator.I see this as an opportunity to make a little cash, to tell you the truth. The Republican Party is gonna be looking for negroes to be in every fucking photograph taken of every fucking Republican for the next two years. I want to offer my services, for a nominal fee, of course, as the ‘Negro in the Picture.’ I figure I can make a buttload of money. There are a hell of a lot of Republicans in office, and none of them know any negroes at all, apparently, so I could be of great use to them. I have to wait until my prescription for my allergies is filled, however. I’m deathly allergic to heterosexual Christian right-wing Republicans and I can’t get near one without breaking out in hives. Oh, I’m allergic to homosexual ones too, but there are so few of them around, that it’s not a problem.Anywho, I think some good can come of all this. Besides, if we had elected Joan Jett-Blakk as President, we wouldn’t have had all these problems for all these years …
… Shed a tear for dear, departed Joe Strummer. The Clash was one of the best of the original punk bands. They were among the first to combine reggae and punk. In fact, one of their records was produced by the great (and crazy) Lee ‘Scratch’ Perry. The Clash also stayed on course as a political punk band, which is something that I think the music has lost.
Goodbye, Joe Strummer.
You will be missed …