It’s been a while since I last thanked my readers for supporting my crazy perspectives in this space. After seven years of writing, it’s your constant feedback (from around the country) and topic ideas, that keep me going. It’s especially refreshing to receive feedback from articles written years ago, like the recent heart-warming e-mail from a 72-year-old white man from South Carolina after reading, ‘Nigger Rich, 2003’; go figure. Now on to this month’s topic, a virus called ‘The Lock-Down.’

You can always tell when a person is suffering from this illness. Symptoms include: loss of voice, loss of freedom, and shrinking of the ‘balls/ovaries.’ The bug that causes this illness is difficult to diagnose in its initial stages because it moves slowly, smoothly, and strategically. In fact, most folks don’t realize they’ve been exposed to it in the early stages. By the time it hits full force, they’ve lost friends, self-respect, and freedom to think. Additionally, this virus is resistant to most drugs, except maybe Mace or Raid. Now, the only way to eradicate your system of this virus is to look the bug dead in the eye and firmly say ‘No!’ Keep saying ‘No’ until the power of your words frees you from your its hold. Once that’s done, the healing process can begin. Call a few old friends to reconnect, ‘Waddup? I was thinking about you.’ Then purchase a few books on ‘How to rebuild your shattered self-esteem and identity.’ Read them! After a few weeks of recuperation, you should be able to reach down and feel the growth of healthy new balls/ovaries. Time to celebrate! You’ve endured misery, but now you’re the victor; the lock-down virus is dead.

On the real tho, I feel for those, butch/stud/aggressive/femme individuals, who have experienced, or still are enduring this life-controlling situation. No adult should allow another adult to dominate her/his life completely; it’s unhealthy. Unfortunately, it happens; the villains are mainly womyn: straight, femme, and sometimes even butch/stud. The victims, in most cases, are butch/studs, aggressives, and of course men.

These lock-down behaviors and problems exist because wimyn want to nest, and she needs a quality candidate to join her, one who is: loving, mature, successful, responsible, healthy, and has integrity. The problem, however, is that her key candidate may not want her, or may not be ready to settle down; however, she plans to have her way. Her first challenge is to remove her victim from the dating market, to eliminate competition while she works her magic (she’ll drag her kicking and screaming if necessary). To assist her in this endeavor, she uses a highly strategic game entitled, ‘I’m all the womyn you need, you just don’t know it yet,’ which is a combination of: creative persuasion, subtle emotional games, feminine or butch charm, and paying attention to everything the victim says in order to effectively feed into it. If she’s successful, she’ll have her prey securely locked down in her nest.

The problem is there’s rarely a happy ending, because you can’t make a person want to be with you. It’s only a matter of time before she snaps out of your spell; then she’s out! I understand that womyn love the challenge of the chase, but is it really worth it, in the long run, to trick or pressure a person into a relationship?

Do you really win?

vickynabors@hotmail.com