‘Porn experts’ Pubert and Dicksel promise to be punctual, picky and probing with all their reviews. Thumbs up the butt (good review) or thumbs down the throat (gag me bad review). Grab your popcorn, your lube and enjoy the ride!
Judging a Porn By Its Cover
Pubert: The model on the cover (Niko) is incredibly hot!
Dicksel: He looks unreal. Hot Hot Hot House.
Our Mischief begins with a tanned hottie rubbing himself on his lawn chair. Suddenly, he gets interrupted by two others towel fighting.
P: Someone just had a moment.
D: Now the guys in the background are rubbing lotion on each other.
P: I met one of them at the leather market here last year. Small world… .
D: How cute, they just threw him in the pool. Which always leads to a blowjob.
P: Yeah, he’s getting a double Speedo sausage sandwich! These guys have the perfect tans. I need a vacation.
More mayhem erupts poolside with a one-on-one coupling.
P: They’re doing the spread eagle in the gazebo.
D: This is a like a workout that they do together. They make it look easy.
It’s lunchtime as our story continues with a grassy lawn scene.
D: How cute, a picnic lunch. Look at him rub that lotion on.
P: This video really takes its time and lets you body worship the stars.
D: Yuck, the one approaching him is wearing Hawaiian shorts.
P: I bet he is hung; with a mug like that he must be.
D: And he is! This video is not for beginners.
After lunch, we have dessert with our cover boy Niko. He is going for a quick dive into the pool.
P: I hope he doesn’t get cramps swimming so soon after lunch.
D: Wow, it’s a split screen. You get two for the price of one! He is trimmed like he was in the spa all day.
P: I am gonna go home and shave now. Even long hair looks good on him. He looks like Colin Farrell in the New World movie.
On a grassy knoll nearby two guys are shooting their water guns at each other.
D: Someone is going to get super soaked!
P: Even how they pull off their swimsuits is sexy.
The last scene is on the other disc. Includes a fun-fuck-filled four-way.
P: This video says ‘adults only’ and I can barely handle it at 36!
D: Yeah, you need 4 or 5 times to get through it, worth every penny. Niko should have had another scene with someone, not a solo jack off. It was still hot though.
P: Why is it called Mischief? Because the guys play little water pistol games? They should have called in Brokeback Pool Party.
Pubert: Big thumbs up the butt
Dicksel: Big thumbs up the butt
Check it out on www.HotHouse.com
What Mischief have you been up to lately? puberty@windycitytimes.com