Kelly McGillis. Photo courtesy of Strand Releasing

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McGillis Raises L

Kelly McGillis is an actress who has always known how to work her unique brand of sexuality to her big gay following. Whether playing an amorous lesbian in The Monkey’s Mask, defending Jodie Foster in The Accused, or putting on a military uniform to seduce Tom Cruise in Top Gun, McGillis has an almost Dietrich-like capacity for bewitching men and women alike. So how perfect, then, that she’s joining the cast of Showtime’s The L Word in the sapphic soap’s forthcoming fifth season, as a military lawyer handling a ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ case. (Sounds like Alice’s relationship with Iraq vet with Tasha is no longer on the D.L.) McGillis and the show’s cadre of drama-loving lesbians (with their enviable jobs, perfect hair, designer outfits, and great apartments) will return in January.

Sara Gilbert Returns with a Big Bang

Off camera, Sara Gilbert—aka Roseanne’s most sarcastic teenager—is all grown up and a happy new mom with partner Allison Adler. On camera, she’s not only a recurring presence on ER, but she’s also about to reunite with her former ‘husband,’ fellow Roseanne alum Johnny Galecki. The Big Bang Theory, a new CBS sitcom, centers around Galecki and Jim Parsons (Judging Amy) as two socially awkward scientists who become friends with their hot new neighbor, played by Kaley Cuoco (8 Simple Rules). Gilbert will guest star in a multiple-episode arc on the fledgling comedy as a physicist colleague and possible love interest for Galecki. Provided the show survives the usual harsh new series cancellation rate, the chemistry’s already built in.

Liz Sends Love Letters

Many of today’s more ubiquitous celebrities—the kind who would attend the opening of an envelope—could stand to take a lesson or two from Elizabeth Taylor. The screen goddess limits her public appearances, thereby assuring that when she does hit the red carpet, it’s major news. And since she often leverages this press exposure for charitable causes, it’s a win-win situation. Both her stature and her privacy will allow her to demand big bucks for a one-night-only stage performance of Love Letters, opposite James Earl Jones, in Los Angeles, with all proceeds going to AIDS organizations. The actress’ appearance is just another milestone in a now nearly three-decade commitment to the cause of HIV and AIDS. Los Angeles audiences with charitable cash to spare for the benefit can catch this rare theatrical appearance in December.

Tequila Takes a Shot at TV

Tila Tequila. Heard of her? If not, then you haven’t spent enough time on MySpace, where she enjoys the status of ‘most-friended’ person on the site. And since this is the sort of achievement that only begets others, the bisexual Internet phenomenon has been signed up for her own reality dating competition on MTV. A Shot at Love with Tequila’s premise is similar to other put-them-all-in-a-house-to-fight-over-one-person smackdowns, but features the added bonus of both male and female contestants (32 of them, to be exact) who, if promotional clips are to be believed, spend as much time making out with and pulling the hair of each other as they do courting Ms. Tequila. This blast of bisexual liberation explodes all over basic cable in October, so don’t miss out.

Romeo San Vicente loves tequila, too, but only as a friend. He can be reached care of this publication, or at DeepInsideHollywood@qsyndicate.com.