Playwright: Jonathan L. Green and Walt McGough. At: Sideshow Theatre Company at Chicago Dramatists, 1105 W. Chicago. Phone: 312-261-0130; $15. Runs through: April 5.

In Shakespeare’s The Winter’s Tale, King Leontes suspects that his wife, Queen Hermione, has been unfaithful. His response is to banish both her and her alleged lover, Polixenes, and to abandon the baby daughter whose fatherhood he now doubts. Sixteen years later, however, the orphaned child, Perdita, marries Florizel, a foreign prince—their union resurrecting Hermione, believed dead of grief, and reuniting foolish Leontes with his wronged family, whereupon all is forgiven.

If you don’t already know this before the curtain rises on Jonathan L. Green and Walt McGough’s cumbersome play, you will puzzle over the exotic names of the all-American, middle-class characters and their discussions of royal primogeniture. Even more confusing will be its juxtaposition of story-theatre whimsy and heightened eloquence recalling Yeats at his most fulsome, along with cutesy regional stereotypes and adult actors playing infants. We also get testimonials delivered over the fourth wall to the audience, satirical jabs at the media and fashions in indie films, too many instant flashbacks (that’s when someone announces an occurrence, immediately after which we are shown the circumstances leading up to it), a long list of tabloid-fare obituaries, and a protracted “dumb-show” prologue where the actors dance to muzak while setting up their stage.

To be sure, there’s nothing wrong with playwrights updating a classic to their own times and locales. Neither is there any fault in darkly romanticist contemplations on mortality. Nor in studies of troubled families (whether geared to adult sensibilities, or as an after-school special for juvenile audiences). Nor in speculating on the prevalence of supernatural phenomena in everyday life—did I mention the ghost of Leontes’ dead son acting as liaison between this world and the next? And while it’s not impossible for all these themes to be featured in a single text, without a unifying concept to tie them together, the resulting narrative resembles nothing so much as a patchwork of developmental sketches.

The Sideshow Theatre Company navigates its dramatic milieu with refreshing aplomb, graciously assisting us during moments of potential disorientation. (When two actors assume different roles than in previous scenes, they explain, “you haven’t met us yet.”) And Lisi Stoessel’s scenic design reflects a Sesame Street resourcefulness (employing the increasingly popular objects-hung-from-the-ceiling motif). But until the authors make up their minds as to what story they want to tell, all we are left with is a rainy-day romp in an overly cluttered attic.