“David Beckham is a god. Just look at him in those underwear ads. I’m not gay, but I would eat food off his body. Preferably something that needs to be mopped up—like eggs. I’d eat it off his stomach.”—Russell Brand discusses his man-crush on Mr. Posh Spice. The funny thing is, I bet David would actually be up for it.
With the election only days away, there’s more flip-flopping to report. But this time, it’s coming from some celebrities. Both Kelly Clarkson and Lindsay Lohan had previously aligned themselves with the Republican party. However, last week they both came out in support of Barack Obama. Lindsay took to Twitter to champion Obama after the last debate—but that doesn’t really mean much since I don’t believe she’s registered to vote! As for Clarkson (who earlier endorsed Ron Paul), she’s changed her mind specifically because of the gay community: “I’m probably going to vote for Obama again, even though I’m a Republican at heart. I can’t support Romney’s policies as I have a lot of gay friends and I don’t think it’s fair they can’t get married.” Thanks, Kell!
Years ago, a powerful porn mucky-muck gave someone a suggestion—take tons of photos of yourself in various outfits and settings. Lock them away. And then every decade or so, dole them out judiciously as new photos. In this way, you’ll never age. No, this is not “The Billy Masters Story.” The advice was given to Jeff Stryker.
Given the porn legend’s reclusiveness, it was a strategy that might have worked. Instead, he followed his own path. Occasionally he resurfaces—like Haley’s Comet. And so, I am pleased to announce that a rare chance to see Stryker in the flesh is once again upon us. This time, it’s at The Boardwalk, Fort Lauderdale, Fla.’s, premiere venue for male “entertainment.” Stryker will be performing Nov. 21-24—giving South Florida something to truly be thankful for. It should be noted that The Boardwalk does allow you to get up close and personal with the talent. For those of you who REALLY wanna some quality time, there are 25 VIP tickets available each night. You can check out BoardwalkBar.com for more details.
Our “Ask Billy” question comes from Barry in Chicago: “I was really disappointed in Magic Mike. After all the hype, not enough stripping—especially from Matt Bomer, who almost seemed like an extra. Was there more that we didn’t see?”
You’re not the only one to have felt duped. Many of my fans expressed disappointment in the lack of any male nudity—to say nothing of the paucity of screen time for both Matt Bomer and Joe Manganiello. It should be noted that while both of these guys are bona fide TV stars, neither of them are big names at the box office. But now that you mention it, I suppose they didn’t have many lines of dialogue—surely no more than Kellan Lutz in any of those Twilight flicks! Be that as it may, much more footage does exist, particularly of Bomer. I went on a bit of a quest and found what you’re looking for—his solo strip as the Living Doll. I’m particularly partial to the exposure this sequence gives to his perfect posterior. Or did I prefer his bouncing bulge? Before you rush out and buy it, a word of warning—the DVD and Blu-Ray versions do NOT contain the extended dance sequences (despite some misleading advertising). The only way to see all is to buy the special Blu-Ray+DVD+UltraViolet Digital Copy Combo Pack (and good luck remembering that). Or in a pinch, you could just go to BillyMasters.com.
This leads to a story about Jackie Collins. During an interview with GayDar Radio, she made some claims which I’d like to quote here: “Matt Bomer, who is the most gorgeous-looking guy and the star of White Collar, was up for the role of Superman. He had not come out of the closet, but people in the know knew he was gay. His audition tape went in and he called up the agent. Someone didn’t like him and told them he was gay. They said, ‘No, no, we can’t cast you.’ The reason he didn’t get cast was because he was gay.” There’s lots of murky stuff in that quote—and some false information. Since Jax didn’t give you many details, let me fill in the gaps, as it were.
First, the film she’s talking about is not the upcoming Man of Steel starring Henry Cavill. Jackie’s actually referring to what eventually became the 2006 Superman Returns that starred Brandon Routh and was directed by Bryan Singer. The backstory is very long and complicated. Singer replaced director Brett Ratner, who wanted Superman to be played by Jude Law, who was not interested. Next choice was Josh Hartnett—what ever happened to him? He was allegedly offered $100 million for the film and two sequels. He turned it down. Paul Walker was offered the role. He also declined. Screen tests were given to Ashton Kutcher, Brendan Fraser, Matt Bomer, David Boreanaz and Victor Webster (who was the only one to do a screen test as both Clark Kent and Superman). Ratner thought he struck gold with James Marsden, but by that point he became frustrated and quit, claiming the film was impossible to cast. Then McG came in as director and he did screen tests with Jason Behr, Jared Padalecki and even Henry Cavill. He eventually quit and that’s when Bryan Singer came aboard. He made the decision to try and replicate the success of the first movie by casting a virtual unknown (Routh).
When some of these details were brought to Miss Collins’ attention, she said a film executive told her this story “ages ago.” “You can’t trust them I guess. I have more faith in Santa Claus now than I do an exec.”
When I’m more reliable than Joan Collins (and Santa Claus), it’s definitely time to end yet another column. You’d think I was done, but I’ve got one more penis up my sleeve … admittedly an odd place for one. Because some of you asked, I’ll also post footage of Chord Overstreet stripping on Glee—it seems to fit with this week’s milieu. You can find that and everything else on www.BillyMasters.com —the site that shows all. And tells all, too. So if you have a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Jeff Stryker reveals that he also auditioned for Superman! Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.