Business & Pleasure from Lucas Entertainment
Starring Adam Killian and Jeremy Stevens
Jerry Nunn: A brand new column to start out the New Year!
Diablo: 2013 is going to have some dirty days, I can feel it.
JN: The front cover looks very professional.
D: Where do I punch in? That’s my kind of job if that’s professional!
Our adventure begins with Jimmy Durano interviewing new candidate Mitchell Rock.
JN: I like those pinstripe suits.
D: He just asked if Rock’s a team player or not.
JN: He’s showing Durano on his boner.
D: Who has a naked man picture on the wall in a business office?
JN: This is an office that’s hard at work!
D: Check out Jimmy’s dragon tattoo.
JN: You can only see it if his underwear is pulled down.
D: It’s crouching Mitchell, hidden dragon.
JN: In business suits there is a lot to strip out of.
D: I think that’s the fetish of it all.
JN: Did you notice there is no cheesy porn music?
D: It’s so quiet I can hear a cock drop.
JN: There’s a rubber tree plant in the office but no ant.
D: He just sniffed his underwear as he took it off Rock.
JN: He’s licking that dress sock like there’s no tomorrow.
D: Mitch has got a twitch in that ass.
JN: Those sounds that are coming out of him aren’t human. He needs an exorcism!
D: The devil is wearing Prada.
Meanwhile at another office across town, a lawyer has his client sign some divorce papers. When the client has no money things are offered in trade.
JN: Wow, Vito Gallo is hung like a horse.
D: But his name means chicken in Spanish!
JN: I’ve got a hunch he’s Italian with that name.
D: And that sausage…
JN: That Vito looks intense.
D: His penis has a huge body but a small head.
JN: He’s trying to stuff that Italian sausage into a small hole on top of a desk.
D: That weiner is as red as I am!
JN: He’s just as sweaty as you too.
Jessie Colter receives a booty text from Landon Conrad and drops right in.
D: They don’t even go to the bedroom in this scene.
JN: That couch is all they need.
D: This couple is really loud.
JN: They are going to wake my neighbors with all that moaning.
D: It’s almost like a competition to see who is the loudest.
Two engineers work on building plans together.
JN: Good thing they have their hardhats on.
D: The construction worker looks like Big Dick Richie from Magic Mike.
JN: He makes my True Blood boil as a wolf too.
D: He just painted his walls with sperm.
JN: You are so bad, D!
The final scene has Jeremy Stevens making Adam Killian an offer he can’t refuse.
D: They just swallowed some kind of pink Viagra.
JN: Leave it to the gays to pop pink Viagra.
D: Well, it did the trick all right.
JN: Even when I met Adam last summer I don’t remember a tattoo on the back of his head.
D: Maybe his hair was longer back then.
JN: That angle is nice. Ride ’em, Killian!
D: He made him sign papers after sex?
JN: Talk about sealing the deal.
D: It finished with a little business and a lot of pleasure.
Jerry Nunn: I give it a crucifix up, plus a rosary.
Diablo: Crucifix up.
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