1. If you prefer to swim in a sea of testosterone then you might want to make plans for the organized hedonism of The Fireball (sponsored by The Hearts Foundation), a Chicago-based circuit party that will happen Feb. 16-18, 2001. The site (www.thefireball.com) has a ton of details: photos, mission statement (to help those with HIV/AIDS), volunteer applications, ticket info, and even testimonials. I promise you men, muscles, and music; the rest is up to you.

2. On the other hand, if you crave wine, women, and song, there’s the Black Bra Party—which, interestingly enough, is Feb. 18 (the same weekend as the Fireball party). It’s being held at Drink & Eat (702 W. Fulton), which has three floors and eight bars—including one in an elevator! So I promise ladies, lingerie, and lager; the rest is up to you. Check out the Metromix site (www.metromix.com), search for “Drink & Eat,” and then look at “Upcoming Events”; you.ll get all the details you need. Or see www.members.aol.com/blackbraparty.

I’m at: turn_it_up@hotmail.com.