‘I sing the rage right out of me,’ Judy Garland once said. So does Alexandra Billings—one of Chicago’s pre-eminent performers in theatre and cabaret. The Garland quote—from Billings’ idol—is highlighted in the biography section of her Web site (www.Alexandra-billings.com) and details her long struggle to conquer every performance arena she’s stepped into.
I first encountered Billings as Shante, a female impersonator who headlined at the Baton. One year at the Miss Continental pageant in the late ’80s she was asked, ‘Why do you want to be Miss Continental?’ and she answered without hesitation, ‘Because I believe more than anything that the push and the drive to succeed can take you anywhere in life.’ Her intensity made one sit up and take notice—though it lost her the crown. She was trumped moments later by another contestant who cooed, ‘Winning means nothing if you can’t be sweet, too.’
Billings is not sweet. But she is funny as hell and genuine and enormously talented. Too talented to be strait-jacketed for long in the world of drag—as she realized when she embarked on her own perilous personal and creative journey. Billings has worked hard to break down a lot of barriers—beautifully and painfully detailed in her tour-de-force show, Before I Disappear. Shante the drag queen has become Alexandra the woman who sings and acts and wins awards.
Now Billings is leaving Chicago. But first, a last concert show, The Unknown Judy Garland, a follow-up to her first smash CD, this one titled, The Story Goes On. And of course, some parting thoughts.
RK: The first thing I want to do is use the term that you prefer.
AB: Oh here we go.
RK: Is it transgendered female?
AB: I prefer ‘Middle-aged actress looking for work.’ (laughs) Yes, I think we need to approach it as if we are trans-gendered females. We have males, then we have trans-gendered males and we have females and trans-gendered females. That covers everybody.
RK: That does seem to cover it.
AB: It’s weird because it took so long for Chicago to get used to the fact of me but the theatrical community seems to be a little more educated than Hollywood. The only reason I say that is because there’s nobody like me in Hollywood. I’m it and they keep looking at me going, ‘How do we? Uh? What? Can’t you just … ?’ They’re very confused.
RK: Is that the reason you’re moving out there?
AB: No—if it’s political I’m going to drive myself crazy. I’m going out because I want to do other things. I don’t want to do crap, garbage pilots and finger-snapping drag queens and I don’t want to play murderous transsexuals but I have a feeling that I’m going to have to do that for awhile until I can turn to somebody and say, ‘Okay, listen, can we have this character just be kooky and wacky and also just happen to be transsexual?’
It’s the kind of thing where you go, ‘Thank God, the fight’s over, oh great, now I can just do my thing’ and then somebody walks up and rains on your parade and says, ‘I’m sorry, you can’t do that here’ and you say, ‘Well—I just did that over there why can’t I do it here?’ ‘Because it’s wrong.’ It’s like this marriage thing. It’s wrong in the United States but it’s right in Canada? What? Is anybody paying attention? The government is telling us who we’re supposed to love. Things are getting really weird. The whole world is asunder.
RK: It’s amazing to me how this group has affected the emotional and moral climate of the country so immensely.
AB: And here’s the thing—my community is completely invisible. We don’t exist. The only reason we exist is because occasionally men will dress up in drag.
RK: So that’s another reason why it’s good for you to take this next step.
AB: I hope so. It’s been a very difficult decision. I’m 42 years old. The agent that I got out there sat me down and said, ‘You will not work out here. You have to be 22, blonde and gorgeous and you have to be a size three and eat gum for breakfast. However, because of what you are, I can sell you.’ Now here’s the dichotomy—I’ve never ever EVER capitalized on what I was. I’ve never been ashamed of what I was but I’ve just never capitalized on it.
RK: Well, it’s never been a selling point before.
AB: But now that I’m going to California it has to be—it’s the only way I can sell myself. I hope to sort of go out there and work as much as I can and come back here and do plays.
RK: And the singing?
AB: I’ll sing wherever I can—hell, I’ll sing on a street corner.
RK: Let’s Talk about the Unknown Judy Garland Show.
AB: I’ve been wanting to do this for a longtime. We’re doing ‘By Myself’ from I Could Go On Singing, her last movie, ‘Comes Once In A Lifetime,’ ‘The Jitterbug’—the song that was deleted from The Wizard Of Oz. But we’re not doing ‘Over The Rainbow’ or ‘The Man That Got Away.’ You cannot sing ‘Over The Rainbow’ and not hear Garland’s voice. You can’t. I wanted to stay away from the familiar songs because of the comparisons. I also wanted to do something that showed the kind of singer she was so that’s why we took all these lesser known tunes. Mitchell Fain, the director, has taken the concert form and theatricalized it. It’s got some scenes, it has some vignettes; it has an actual radio show in it. It’s going to be an interesting evening. It’s not just me up there singing a bunch of songs.
RK: Is Garland the biggest influence on you as a singer?
AB: Oh yeah. Bar none.
RK: Why?
AB: I don’t know why. How does she affect you?
RK: It’s that she could do everything vocally—within one song—and it was all so deeply emotional.
AB: That’s exactly the way I feel. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to steer clear of her big hits.
RK: Are you going to do ‘I’ll Plant My Own tree’ from Valley of the Dolls in the show, the movie that Judy got fired from?
AB: I wish I would have thought of that. Oh, you bastard, what a great idea! That’s such a terrible song! That movie is so fabulously bad. My favorite line is, ‘Broadway don’t go for booze and dope.’ I always think, ‘Uh-yeah, they do!’
RK: Your first CD, Being Alive, did really well, so why not go back into the studio and try to repeat that success. Why opt for a live recording with The Story Goes On?
AB: I haaaaated being in the studio. I don’t get it. I don’t understand it. It’s a whole different muscle that I don’t have and I didn’t have a good time doing it. I swore to myself I’d never do it again. We were doing this concert and I said, ‘Why don’t we record this and see if we can use any of it?’ and we got some nice stuff. It was fun because I didn’t have to think about it. I could just go out and perform and sing the way I sing.
RK: Is there a theme?
AB: It was sort of an accidental theme. I didn’t plan it but for some reason every song had to do with ‘once upon a time’ or a prince or a princess or a dragon. We just hooked it all together and we called it a fairy tale. If you read Grimm’s Fairy Tales they’re very gruesome and all these horrible things happen to the heroine or hero and in the end, they come out a learned person; a different person. I wrote a little fairy tale and I read it at the end of the concert.
RK: Any appearances to support it?
AB: Hopefully we’ll have a CD release party whenever I decide that the CD is actually going to be released. The CD itself is really cool—it goes back to the Judy thing. It’s one of those albums where you have to listen to the beginning in order to understand the end. Remember those great live albums by Liza and Bette Midler? Listening to those was an experience and that’s what I wanted this to be. I’m still just trying to get past the sound of my voice!
RK: Is this concert the last show before you leave town?
AB: Yeah—it’s the last big concert definitely. This is it. I’m doing some small gigs here and there but this is the last big hurrah. It’s gotta be. We gotta get the heck out of here.
RK: Is there a song from the CD you’re doing?
AB: Oh yeah—Judy’s original version of ‘Come Rain Or Come Shine’—it’s a helluva version.
RK: OK, so what have you learned, Dorothy?
AB: (laughs) I’ve learned that Broadway don’t go for boooooze and dope … .
Alexandra Billings in The Songs That Got Away—The Unknown Judy Garland, a theatrical concert, with musical director Russ Long. The Theatre Building. 1225 W. Belmont Ave., 8p.m., Thursday-Saturday April 22-24 & 2 p.m. matinee on Sat., April 24, Box Office: (773) 327-5252.
About Face Theatre Wonka Ball 2004
About Face Theatre will host Wonka Ball 2004, its 4th annual benefit for the nationally recognized, award-winning About Face Youth Theatre and related Education Outreach programs Thursday, June 3 at Architectural Artifacts, 4325 N. Ravenswood, 6:30 p.m. to 10:30 p.m. Chicago’s Nate Berkus will serve as Honorary Co-Chair for this year’s event, along with Chicago notable Michael Leppen.
Wonka Ball 2004 will be Burning Hot, Chicago Hot. Set in a swinging 1930s-themed speakeasy, guests will enjoy the live jazz of the Ben Waggley Trio along with several of Chicago’s finest cabaret performances, in addition to hors d’oeuvres and cocktails provided by several of Chicago’s most superb caterers. Co-Chairs are Gigi Belser and Ted Grady. Call (773) 784-8565 ext. 111, or see adam@aboutfacetheatre.com.