with
randy
pubert
Cirque Noir
by Titanmen.com
Are you down with O and P? Porn critics Randy Pubert and Olympia Du-cock-kiss give perspectives from the gay and lesbian point of view that could make a steel magnolia blush. Grab your popcorn, your dildo and enjoy the ride!
Judging a Porn By Its Cover
Pubert: Anything with a slipcover I like!
Olympia: Very Moulin Rouge-esque. (A little packet falls out). Is that an Ecstasy tab?
P: No, the video comes with lube.
Two guys sit down to eat popcorn and watch a circus act, as our show begins…
P: Opening night must be slow, no crowd.
O: Not every gay boy can ride a unicycle. I wasn’t scared of clowns until now.
P: I have been scared of them since I was little. He’s wearing a giraffe g-string.
O: The clown is peeing on him now. Did he drink the Pacific Ocean beforehand?
P: How is he doing that with his tongue?
O: It’s called a split tongue. He can operate the sides of his tongue independently. They’ve been around for a while.
P: I’m always the last to know.
O: And those are called scrotal ladders.
P: You are the perfect person to review this with.
O: It’s amazing what you gay boys can put in your rectums.
P: You are so right. The clown is putting a wooden toy in that guy’s ass now.
O: It’s like a clown car that can fit everything in it.
For the next act we get an acrobat performing his balance beam naked…
O: Wow, we get naked ass balancing. Who knew?
P: Look at that butt. I wonder if the Gay Games will be like this?
O: They are in some supreme shape here.
P: Let’s put him on the trapeze and make him do some splits.
O: He’s a real sword swallower, giving him a blowjob that way.
P: Now he’s taking two penises at the same time. This guy is full of tricks.
Our third act includes a trio of animals. Lions, tigers and bears, oh my!
O & P: [Both scream!]
P: He just fisted himself.
O: He’s like the rubber man or a human pretzel.
P: Now we get a three way with a female to male tranny. This video has it all.
O: This guy is a handsome dude. I like all the piercings. Also, we get a fire spinner. I can do that.
P: Oh Olympia, you are full of hidden talents.
O: This video is more of a fascinating thing to look at than a turn-on.
P: Yeah, it’s interesting to look at. These guys have skills but this video is not for the average guy. I’m gonna go practice my splits.
Pubert: Thumbs down the clown throat
Olympia: Thumbs down the throat
Scared of clowns? E-mail pubert@windycitytimes.com
To buy a ticket to this circus go to www.Titanmen.com