As the weeks go by in this already hectic summer, I get more and more indications that perhaps I’m getting too old for this job. Sure, five years ago I was a dreamy-eyed go-getter, dead set on conquering the gay bar scene and making a name for myself. Well, the name’s been made, the drink’s been drunk and, now in my (still) early 30s, this ol’ body’s beginning to slow to a crawl. I’m left wondering: What’s with these kids today?
At no time was this pondering more clear than at Jackhammer at approximately 3:23 a.m. DJ Kevin Bernal, after a brief chat, threw on Since You’ve Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson. I don’t mind Ms. Clarkson. I’ll admit she’s got a good voice, but I’m not going to injure myself over her. And this is what sets me apart. Because, inexplicably, every time I’m in a room with people under the age of 30 and this track comes on, the entire room begins to jump up and down, triumphantly and in remarkable unison. I clutch my Absolut cranberry, find a solid wall to stand against and pray to Jesus for my safety. I’m not trying to get my fragile old man toes broken by the bounding youth of today.
Can somebody please try to explain this to me? Was I ever like this? Now, MMMBop was a good song, but this shit’s ridiculous.
Time to put in my false teeth.
kirk@windycitytimes.com