The Men Having Babies organization is returning to Chicago June 7 for its annual Midwest Surrogacy Conference & Expo, with an expanded format that will allow attendees to learn more about the journey to parenthood.
The two-day conference, hosted at Center on Halsted, 3656 N. Halsted St., is one of the organization’s seven worldwide boots on the ground efforts.
“It’s an opportunity to get immersed in everything you need to know as a parent,” Executive Director Ron Poole-Dayan said. “Typically, to become a parent to service you need an agency, you need a clinic, you need lawyers. You need a mental health professional. … So they’re all going to be there, and they’re all providers. The vast majority of them also provide discounts or pro bono services through our assistance program.”
The conference is open to both couples and singles, with single attendees making up almost a quarter of the crowd, according to Poole-Dayan. The organization helps gay men navigate the obstacles to biological parenthood, offering advocacy programs, while also championing legislation changes that promote inclusivity. Membership fees start at $250 a year, and members can also receive financial assistance through the organization.
Men Having Babies leaders also create awareness of pre-existing laws, such as Illinois’s law that ensures IVF coverage be inclusive of LGBTQ+ couples, the first of such in the nation. The organization also advocates for the laws to be enacted—Poole-Dayan said that many insurance providers push back, despite the state rules. Men Having Babies has encouraged Illinois representatives to launch a probe that would hold insurance companies accountable.
Leaders also want to promote further financial efforts many men may not be aware of, such as the ability for self-insured companies to offer as much as $100,000 to employees who are looking to adopt or start a family through surrogacy. The organization’s website has a database that gives people more details on companies offering inclusive reproductive benefits, Poole-Dayan said, as part of an initiative to support members on their surrogacy journey. It also includes an advocacy toolkit for people who work for companies without the necessary benefits.
The organization also has launched an initiative to build a research library, with its website linking to several studies on LGBTQ+ parenting and surrogacy, in an effort to counteract misinformation.
Alongside advocacy on the legal side, the organization also seeks to destigmatize gay parenthood, Poole-Dayan pointed to Meta removing photos of gay men with children for breaking community guidelines. Leaders of Men Having Babies push against the stereotype that gay men aren’t interested in parenthood just the same as their heterosexual peers, Poole-Dayan said.
“At the very, very minimum this is a way for our community to get together and help future generations of parents go through this process with the kind of advice— financial and social and advocacy—that didn’t exist before we created babies, and is not accessible as easily [by only looking] online,” Poole-Dayan added.