Relationships. In my thirteen years with my lovely, red-headed love slave we have seen many couples come and go (and go and come). Personally, I cannot imagine what it would be like to try to date again. I hear other people talk about the online dating. I think they should be more clear in the profiles and really tell people which person they are of the couple. We all recognize these people. It would make dating a lot easier. These are the couples Robin and I have met throughout the years. So Strap This On for August!
The Top Ten Types of Couples
10) The ‘I’m a Princess’ Couple. This is the couple in which one partner does all the work–or, as I like to call it, ‘Make me dinner, baby, and don’t forget my glass of wine.’
9) The Volatile Couple. This couple loves to fight publicly and get themselves all worked up so they can go home and have make-up sex privately.
8) Childhood Sweethearts Couple. This couple has been together since high school or college and not been with anyone but each other.
7) The Beautiful Couple. These two are just both so beautiful, they have to be together. They spend lots of money on hair care products and tanning beds and never miss a chance to check themselves out in every reflective surface they pass by.
6) Wandering Eyes Couple. The couple who has one person that cheats and everyone knows but their partner. There’s nothing like a digital camera and an anonymous email in those situations.
5) Drunk and/or high Couple. This couple has been drunk or high since the day they met and still are.
4) The ‘What the Hell are They Doing Together’ Couple. These people have nothing in common and do everything apart. This is better known as the marriage of convenience. I hope the sex is at least great or that one of them has a lot of money.
3) The Mommy/Daddy Syndrome Couple. Mommy/daddy didn’t love them enough (blah, blah, blah… get over it), so they marry their mom or dad and act like the partner is the missing parent.
2) The Get a Room Couple. This couple is physically all over each other publicly to the point of making everyone in the room uncomfortable. If I’m watching someone go at it, I at least want the award-winning porn soundtrack going… ‘bow, chica bow bow.’
1) The You Complete Me Couple. OK, these two perfectly balance one another in every way. They openly love each other, are honest, faithful, still have disagreements, laughs, etc. Personally, I don’t know how Robin and I got here. We just started dating a little over thirteen years ago, decided to move in together, make the commitment, and we’re still here. No lesbian bed death here, thank you.
I can be reached at StrapThisOn@aol.com